I am the oldest ward of the state, ever. Or at least I feel as though I am. On the weekend, my Dad went on a cross country journey to find work, or maybe it was to find himself. Either way, this was how I came about my new status. I spent the weekend dodging phone calls from well meaning neighbors who were practically making sympathy calls, offering me food, shelter, etc. My extended family of aunts and uncles and grandmother are likely sitting at their kitchen tables, discussing "poor Krista's situation" over a cup of hot tea. This is the part where they also decide who gets "poor Krista" for the holidays. Cute eh? Just call me little orphan Krista. But wait,something that they don't seem to understand is : I am 24, and I surprisingly have lived on my own before. I can feed myself, keep warm, and *gasp* stay alive without the supervision of an ADULT. I can't help think that what is happening around me is an early symptom of the Spinster Effect. This is when you have a single woman in your family, and you are constantly assuaged with guilt about being a part of a happy couple during the holidays and other important life moments. This causes you to send flowers to your single friend on Valentine's Day (in essence making her feel worse, because it makes her realize just how sad her life is when the only valentine she gets is from her married friend); invite the aforementioned spinster to your house for all important holidays; and constantly assure the Spinster Girl that having a man really isn't what it is cut out to be(which you have to accept with a wane smile and fake laugh). So as my family begins to feel the effects of the Spinster Effect, I will be heartily wishing for the holidays to pass me by, and I can move on with my life until the next major holiday, which this insane cycle begins all over again...ugh!